WALLY VS. KGB - PART III

Wally made a professional getaway from the Rīga cops last night. Wally sees that for intellectual readers who have tuned in now that this is a perplexing state of affairs. Wally Kranich is in a no prisoners taken war with the KGB. Wally is in big trouble. However Wally sees that Milda Mother Latvija is on his side! Wally now gives you portals to previous chapters of Wally VS KGB!
WALLY VS. KGB - PART I
WALLY VS. KGB - PART II

Wally now presents to his intellectual readership the next blog from his war against the KGB!

Wally saw that the Rīga cops who came to get Wally were not truly Rīga cops. Wally saw that the Rīga police department is compromised and in the service of the KGB. However Wally broke a toe when he jumped out his kitchen window. Wally is a strong Latvian man and his morning pushups saved his life.

Wally ran behind buildings and behind bushes. Wally took a taxi to the Minska plaza on Dzelzavas ielā. Wally had enough money left that he took from the safe at his fraternity house. Wally entered the Admirāļu klubs there.

Wally had his mobile phone with him and he called his fraternity brother Edvins. Edvins is from Canada and Edvins knows how to play the game. Edvins wife was too controlling when Edvins wanted to have some fun with chicks in Rīga a few years ago.

Wally needed time to think. There were so many questions. Who was killing the hookers? Were the fucking cops killing hookers? Was this the work of that Luguvoi bastard who killed Litvenenko? Wally saw a guy who looked like Luguvoi at the Centrālā tirgus last week and Wally got a chill. Wally went to the WC at Admirāļu klubs . Wally is sure that those meat pelmini were bad because Wally has the shits. Wally wonders if that girl Masha has the shits?

Wally was on the can when Edvins returned his call. Wally explained about Luguvoi working with Wally’s landlady Mittijs to set up Wally because Wally was too effective as the Karl Rove of Latvija. Wally said to Edvins that they needed to call the Latviešu Toronto boys out of retirement to play hardball with Luguvoi and Putin. Edvins asked to Wally what that was? Wally said dead hookers and that Wally was worried if Masha had the shits. Edvins said, no not that but the noise. Wally explained to Edvins that Wally had the shits from bad pelmini. Edvins was silent and then said that there is no way Latvijas companies would produce bad food and that Wally was probably poisoned. Wally thought hard. Wally wondered if Masha poisoned him? What did Masha put in the pelmini? Edvins said that a normal man would be dead from the poisoning attempt but Wally has a strong Latvian constitution.

Edvins said for Wally to meet him at his office on Brīvības ielā in two hours and then we could make a plan. Wally said yes and went back to the Klub after cleaning up. Wally saw some friendly chicks. Wally ordered drinks but did not have money. Wally had some words with one friendly chick named Masha. Wally saw it was a different Masha. Masha spoke good Latvian.

Wally told the story about the other Masha. Masha II asked where we could go. Wally kissed her but then some Russian leather head mafia stooge told Wally to leave. Wally would have killed the stooge but he had the shits. Wally went to the WC again. Wally saw that the poison was strong because Wally passed out on the toilet hours later.



Luguvoi is a genius at what he does. However Wally sees that Luguvoi does not know he is playing by Toronto Latviešu rules!

WALLY VS. KGB - PART II

Wally is in big trouble. FSB and KGB are after him! Wally left his hideaway apartment in Dārzciems early Saturday morning. Wally stopped off at his fraternity house on Stabu ielā. No one was there so Wally helped himself to some drinks to help him think.

Wally has questions he cannot answer yet. Who bugged Wally’s apartment? How long has Missus Mittijs been working for the KGB? Who killed the hooker to set up Wally? How compromised are the Riga police? Wally sees the police are working for the KGB by coming after Wally about the dead hooker!
I n other news Wally is most pleased by the good image Latvijas Presidents, Valdis Zatlers, is making for Latvija in the world. Wally sees that his first foreign visits were successful visits to Estonia and Lithuania. Wally sees that Zatlers is the rug that holds the Baltic room together! Wally sees that Zatlers has the finest hair of all Baltic leaders and maybe in Europe overall!

Wally is also pleased to see that Zatlers also showed to Nato that Latvija is serious about fighting Muslim terrorists in Afganistans! Wally’s heart pounded with pride as Zatlers said Latvija would increase its troops there! At the same time Denmark and other countries are not so strong. Presidents Zatlers made Latvijas promise to Nato Presidents, Jaap de Hoof Scheffers. Jaap de Hoof sounds like a stupid name and better as the name of a sex club in Amsterdam. Wally is certain that Latvijas Presidents had a hard time not laughing at Jaap de Hoof. What a joker!

Wally sees in other news Aivars Lembergs, Ventspils pilsētas mērs, is making news. Wallys sees that critics of Lembergs release are fearful that the investigation into Lembergs corruption will be impeded. Wally’s legal training in America and Canada tells him that the investigation could be affected. Wally’s opinion is that habeas corpus must be suspended in the case of Lembergs who might be guilty! Wally’s legal background has allowed him to see such criminals get away a million times. However if Wally took the case than things might go well for Lembergs!

Wally next stopped at Dickens. However Wally saw that the chicks there were lezbos and tight ass snobs. Wally went to Paddy’s across the road. It was dead. Wally went to Pulkvedis to collect his thoughts. Than it hit Wally! Missus Mittijs is not a widow! Her KGB husband who was Commie Party member with Academy of Sciences – he is alive! Wally blew some steam with a nice chick at his fraternity house on Stabu.

Wally waved goodbye to Masha. Wally went back to fraternity house to safe to get some taxi money. Wally went back to his hideaway apartment to confront the devious Missus Mittijs.

When Wally returned to his hideaway apartment in the late night Missus Mittijs was awake! That Mittijs is a devious one! She challenged Wally about a bad smell coming from his hideaway apartment. Wally was going to interrogate Missus Mittijs the KGB agent when the Riga police arrived with more questions about a hooker. Wally heard that this time it was a different dead hooker.

Wally excused himself to use the toilet. Wally really had to go because the meat Pelmini at the fraternity house were probably turned bad. Wally thought for a second that Masha must be sick from the pelmini too. However Wally had no time for thoughts about Masha – it was time for action! Wally jumped out of his kitchen window three floors up and ran into the dark field. Fuck you cops!


Wally will need to visit a close friend for help. Wally sees that these KGB tactics are far superior to any of their old Cold War games! Wally will keep his readers informed!

WALLY VS. KGB

Wally’s day has changed badly. Wally’s apartment is bugged. Wally has been the Karl Rove of Latvija for too long. First the Nashy go after Estonian cousins. Next Latvija. The FSB is after Wally Just like Litvenenko and Berezovsky. Oh Fuck Wally is deep in trouble. I wonder if that Swedish perverts is in on it.

Wally’s intellectual readers might remember that Wally was out with hot Latvian chicks last night. One was Russian and she ask Wally many questions like how much money does Wally make and does he go back to America or Canada. This afternoon after coming back from law office Wally saw a fly on his ceiling. It looked like a fly. But it was dead and felt like plastic. Wally was drinking at work so Wally was not absolutely sure.

Wally called his landlady Missus Mittijs. Missus Mittijs said it was a fly that was stuck. Wally’s landlady Missus Mittijs gave a funny look. Her dead husband was a Communist Party member so Wally never trusted her completely. Better dead than red they used to say.

There was a knock at the door. It was a police officer who asked about a dead prostitute. Someone saw Wally on Čaka ielā. I did not kill anyone. This is a set up. Classic KGB games. Wally needs to go to the bar and make a strategy. Wally will keep his readers informed!